Issue #1 Article#8
The Mutuality of Therapy by Jo-Ann Svensson
In her book, When Boundaries Betray Us, Carter Heywood asks the following
question: If good therapy is objective, is objective therapy good? I think of
this question often in my current life as an energy therapist.
Before becoming a therapist I worked as a mental health worker in a poor
section of Vancouver known as the Downtown Eastside. For six years I held
various positions embedded in the hierarchical and patriarchal mental health
system – a system with both good and bad but one, regardless of the intent,
which tends to enforce an “us vs. them” environment. That is, us being the
caregivers and them being the clients. There are many things that keep these
two forces apart including physical barriers such as desks and closed doors but
the most potent barrier is intangible, it is the barrier of knowledge.
There are many forms of knowledge that act as barriers but the knowledge of I
speak of here is that which allows the caregiver to know everything about the
client and the client to be in the dark about the caregiver. In many areas of
the medical system, especially in mental health, one is strongly encouraged not
to divulge personal aspects about oneself. Now, to be fair, the fear is that
this information could be incorporated into a client’s delusions, however,
there is a fine line between protecting one’s client and dehumanizing them.
As an independent contractor now for the same health board that hired me as a
mental health worker (and working in the same district) I take pleasure in
sharing personal aspects of my life with clients. With careful consideration of
the situation and context I tell some clients of my stepson whom I no longer
see; others of my own therapy (you see a therapist?!) and still others of my
body image issues. Although I am always careful never to lay the burden of
caretaking me onto their shoulders, I am, on the other hand, allowing both of
us to share in the human experience – to be compassionate.
I remember one time when I was still working as a mental health worker. I
visited a mental health drop-in centre (where I had worked some years back)
with a current client and were viewing some pictures on the wall that had been
set up as an ongoing memorial to members who had passed on. It was a poignant
time for me as I recognized people whom I hadn’t realized had died. Noticing
this my client asked me if I wanted a hug. Against all the rules of the game I
nodded and we were both blessed with a most beautiful gift. In the, at times,
dehumanizing environment of the mental health system, he was given the
opportunity to give of his heart and I was given the opportunity to receive of
it.
To deny compassion is to deny humanness. It is to deny that healing is a mutual
opening of hearts and a communion of spirit with the outside world. Healing is
a joining of hands, a recognition of our connectiveness and a mutual expression
of love. Healing is the sharing of the human experience.